Not Your Fault
by AgentNote
Summary: ONESHOT. JJ and Emily have a conversation. Set after Revelations. JJ/Emily frienship, no intended slash. This is my first FanFic, so reviews and feedback would be appreciated! Read more inside and enjoy! Rating is for minor language.


**Author's Note: This is my first ever FanFic, so I'm not sure how it is. This has been written for a while but I had no time to post it. It's just a JJ/Emily friendship, but if you want I guess it could be slash. You'd have to squint, though. Anyways, enjoy it! And reviews would be really appreciated, thanks! Oh and one more thing. This has only been proof read by me, so sorry in advanced for any mistakes. Okay, so go ahead and read and remember...That REVIEW button down there is calling your name!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Criminal Minds. :'( **

**Spoilers: Revelations (2x15) and Fear and Loathing (2x16)**

"He's over there!" Gideon yells. "Go! Go! Go!" He screams at the team, the EMTs, everyone. I watch through hooded eyes as Hotch, Morgan, and Gideon run towards the spot where we heard the gunshot.

I slowly turn my gaze to the blonde who, obviously not as fast as the others, limps over. It pains me to see her in such agony, both mental and physical. I watch her embrace the young man who looks even more hurt than JJ. He stands up, with Hotch's help, and hugs her right back.

I stand back with the swat team, not wanting to interrupt. I am not as close to the boy wonder, as I'm fairly new. Watching, I observe Hotch hugging Reid. Relief washes over all of the team's faces, and I swear all of them have shed a tear, including Hotch. This surprises me, forHotch rarely shows emotion, and rather keeps it bottled up. I slowly walk up to Reid and give him a sincere look, still not wanting to intrude in the closeness of the team. He looks back, terror etched in his face, his body, but thanks me silently. Gideon and Hotch grab his arms as he begins to waver. JJ goes in for another hug.

"I'm so sorry," she whispers.

"It's alright, it's not your fault," Reid responds. Gideon leads him away to the awaiting ambulance. I see JJ mouthing Reid's answer to herself. She then turns towards Morgan. He looks at her solemnly and almost apologetically. Morgan nods and JJ walks off. She seems scared yet relieved at the same time. I have to admit, I'm puzzled at why the two had exchanged the look; was there a tension between them I hadn't been skilled enough to decipher? Deciding to interrogate Morgan later, I walk up to JJ, who was frozen on the spot.

"Jayje," I start, "It's over. Reid's safe. You're safe. Everything is going to be okay." I quietly reassure her until she looks me in the eyes.

"Thank you." I stare at her confused. I can't remember what I did that would cause her to have to thank me so sincerely.

"Um, you're welcome?"

"You don't understand how hard this has been. So...thank you." With that, she walks forward to the second awaiting ambulance that Hotch sent over. Now that Reid was finally safe, JJ let up to Hotch's request of having JJ checked out properly at the hospital. Morgan strolls over to me.

"He's going to be okay." Morgan clearly thinks I'm staring ever so intently at Reid. In reality, though, I'm looking towards JJ. She's always so strong, but the last couple of days I have seen her break down mentally. I know that neither Reid nor JJ will be able to survive this without scars, physical ones as well as mental.

Breaking out of my reverie, Derek nudges me.

"Come on, Emily. Let's get to the hospital. We can see Reid there." I so deeply want to correct him; that right now I want to see JJ. I realize no one had paid her any attention at Hankel's and that the guilt must be eating her alive. I don't correct him, though, and still deep in thought, I follow Morgan towards the black SUV, thoughts consumed with JJ.

One week later.

We're all sitting in the conference room waiting for JJ and Hotch to show up with the details of the new case. Morgan and Garcia are quietly whispering while Gideon leafs through a notebook. I'm staring at Reid who, since his abduction, has not been his usual self. I tried talking to Gideon about Reid's odd behavior and he simply told me to give him time. The whole team knows that Reid isn't at all his self, but all of them agree with Gideon. I tried not to push the matter.

Still though, sitting here watching Reid makes me want to comfort him.

I'm knocked out of my thoughts when Hotch and JJ waltz into the room.

Garcia and Morgan quickly straighten up and Gideon shuts his notebook, opening the case file JJ just handed him.

"Groten, a predominantly white community, is a small suburb located in New York City." JJ starts the debriefing. I look into her eyes and they aren't the normal light blue orbs I'm used to. Instead I notice darker ones, with bags located directly under them.

She must not be getting much sleep, I think to myself.

I snap my head up when I notice eyes staring at me. I silently scold myself for profiling JJ at the same time. I know she isn't too fond of it.

"What?" I ask, praying that one of them will repeat what Hotch said.

"I said we'll debrief more on the plane but right now I want your go bag in your hands and you on that plane. This case is racially motivated, and we all know how they can turn out," Hotch repeats.

I sigh. "Sorry, I zoned out for a second." Noticing the look Hotch gives me, I add, "It won't happen again." I get up to leave, as the rest of the team is filing out as well, but Hotch pulls me aside. Not before I notice a strange interaction between Reid and JJ, though.

Having both arrived at the door at the same time, JJ stepped back, almost scared looking. Reid seems not to notice and walks out. I see JJ breathe a sigh of relief as she leaves, too. I make a mental note to talk to JJ and turn towards Hotch.

"Are you okay, Prentiss? You seem to be a little out of it."

"Huh? Oh yeah, I'm fine, really."

"Alright, well if you're sure. I know that this last case has hit hard for all if us and not just Reid. If you need anything, please don't hesitate to ask," Hotch says. I thank him but assure him I'm fine. As I walk back to my desk I recall what Hotch had said. Reid wasn't the only one hurt, JJ was as well. Why hadn't he mentioned JJ when he said the case had been difficult?

A few days later.

I drop my bag in the hallway, heading straight for my mini bar. I decided on the way home that I wanted to go out for a drink, but would need to be able to drive. So instead I decided I'd have a nice, cold beer and let my mind unfurl. As I sit down, my thoughts go to the events that have occurred in the past couple of weeks. Reid. JJ. Hotch wondering if there was something bothering me when in reality, his two youngest agents were breaking down.

I remember something else and decide to mull it over. JJ. No one seemed to give a damn about JJ. I know that all Hotch and Morgan told her to do was rest. Why, I'm not sure. JJ can be pretty hardheaded. And that thing with the video...Garcia told me she had demanded to see one of the murders. Apparently, she felt she needed to prove something.

As if she could read my mind, I hear my cell phone ring and when I glance at the caller ID, it reads JJ. Deeply concerned for her mental well-being, I answer it immediately.

"Hey Jayje, what's up? Is everything okay?" I figure it may be something to do with the last case we just returned from. The unsub was killing girls who had a potential to be incredible singers. It was also racially motivated, and some of those can turn out pretty badly. Though we were able to save the unsub's last victim, I know how affected JJ is by cases involving kids.

"Emily," I hear her say. Her voice sounds tired, and I can tell she's been crying. Trying to hide her sobs, she continues, "I know that it's late, but do you think you could...maybe..."

She doesn't finish her sentence, but I know what she wants. "Of course JJ. I can be there in ten minutes if I really push the speed limit. Is everything okay? Are you hurt?"

"No, no. I'm fine. I just..." She sighs. "I just need someone."

"Of course, of course. I understand. Jayje don't move one inch. I will be there soon." She thanks me and I end the call. As soon as I do, I am out the door, keys in hand and gun strapped to my side. I feel around in my pocket for my credentials, as I feel safer if I know they are with me at all times. I hop into my car and rev up the engine. In less than ten seconds I am on the road en route to JJ's.

When I arrive, I knock on the door. I hear someone behind it. I swear I can hear at least four locks being unlocked and am reminded of the case we endured just a week ago. No wonder JJ is so upset, I think to myself, she's still terrorized about the Hankel case.

JJ opens the door and I immediately notice something off. First, her eyes are all puffy and red, which confirms that she was indeed crying.

Secondly, I notice her gun is holstered to her side. This confuses me.

I know JJ, and she is not the kind of person who would need to take precautionary measures about anything. All of a sudden, though, it hits me. The numerous locks, her gun by her side, the terrified look I recieve as she welcomes me in...

The dogs. She's still afraid of Hankel's dogs.

No wonder, I think in my head. They nearly killed her. She actually saw a poor, innocent woman being murdered by what she learned to be man's best friend. She almost shot me, for crying out loud! Clearly she developed a new fear that I was stupid enough to forget about. I am about to go in for a hug, when I quickly draw back. What kind of friend am I? All I did was constantly ask her if Reid was okay. The first thing I asked her in the barn back in Georgia, after calming her down of course, was 'where is Reid'. I hate myself for treating her this way and regret my actions.

"JJ. I am so sorry." I start. JJ looks at me confused. Of course, the voice in my mind says. How would she know what I was just thinking?

"Jayje...Back in Georgia I mean..." I trail off, awaiting any sort of reaction. She tenses up a bit at the mention of the haunting case, and I glimpse her hand slightly twitching, reaching for her gun.

"It's okay, it's just me." I gently place my hand over hers, with hopes of comforting the terrified blonde. I look into her eyes, and try to calm her down. I switch into profiler mode and notice how she relaxes at my touch, which shows me she realizes I want to help.

"Are you profiling me?" She asks incredulously. Her face flares to anger, and I pull my hand back.

"What?" I know how she hates when we profile her, but it's in our nature! I mean, it's what our team does for a living. Then again, I often feel bad for JJ. Working with us can get a bit annoying, I'm sure.

"JJ, I'm sorry. It's just an instinct for me, you know."

"Oh right! That's always your excuse! And Hotch's! And Gideon's!" She spits at me. She doesn't mention Reid, and I know why. She feels guilty about his abduction and can't possibly negatively drag him into a conversation simply to win an argument.

Crap! I think to myself, my train of thought pausing. Why do you think she's yelling at you? She hates when you profile her!

I'm about to interrupt her rant, when she adds one more person. "And and-and Morgan! God, he's the worst! Always profiling me then covering it up by flirting with me or offering to buy me a drink after work!

He's such a jerk!" JJ stops suddenly. I've never seen her become this worked up over such a simple subject. My mouth is agape, as well. I never knew she possessed the quality to talk about her colleague and friend in such a harsh way. Deciding not to intrude on her, as her venting is clearly helping her to express her emotion; I stand back, waiting for the worst. She is about to explode. She reels back, opens her mouth, and is on the verge of screaming once again. What actually happens, though, surprises me.

She begins to cry.

In fact, she begins to weep. Her body is heaving sob after sob and I note that she is an emotional mess.

"Oh JJ..." I embrace her in a deep hug, enveloping her slim body into the comforts of my arms. I rub slow circles on her back, trying to soothe her. She begins to relax and when her tears are to a minimum, I pull back and look into her eyes. I am about to let go when JJ's grip on me tightens. She looks petrified. She is holding on to my arm for dear life, and it even begins to sting a tiny bit. I don't care though. All I care about right now is getting JJ back to her normal, happy self.

"JJ, look at me. It's okay, it's just me." When she finally has calmed down enough to look into my eyes, I continue.

"Is everything okay with you and Morgan? I've noticed something off."

I ask her cautiously, not wanting to push too hard.

She sighs and answers, "Yeah, everything's fine."

When she notices my skeptical glance, she adds, "Really."

"Jayje," I start again, convinced she is indeed NOT fine, "I can tell you're not. Please, it's me. You can tell me anything."

JJ just looks at me. Finally she sighs and inhales, wiping away the falling tears.

"Morgan and I talked that night when Reid...when he..." JJ doesn't need to say anymore, I know exactly what event she is talking about. I silently nod and urge her on.

"Well, we talked and he just told me to rest. He told me you all could handle it. I wanted to help, I really did, but Morgan insisted I sleep! It was my fault after all..." JJ stops for a moment and looks back up into my eyes. She breathes in deeply and continues.

"Anyway, he basically blamed me for what happened. He wouldn't say it out loud, but I could tell it's what he was thinking."

Tears streaming down JJ's face, she finishes up her story. "I asked Morgan...I TOLD Morgan that I could tell what he was thinking."

"Which was...?" I ask softly.

JJ hesitates but answers me. "I told him that he thought me and Reid should have stayed together at the barn. He told me that all he knew was one of us was there and the other wasn't. He ended by saying I had to figure the rest out by myself. But Em, he blamed me. I know it. Hell, he still DOES blame me!"

By now JJ is sobbing and heaving. I embrace her and hold her tightly.

I feel horrible for her and never want to let go, but I know I'll have to leave eventually. The one thing I am sure of is that I'll need to have a serious talk with Morgan. What happened to Reid is nobody's fault but Charles Hankel's. How Morgan could possibly have it within himself to blame JJ, I have no idea.

A few moments of silence go by before JJ begins to talk again.

"Listen Em. I don't know how I can ever thank you for coming over.

This means so much to me, you should know that."

"JJ it's not a problem," I say reassuringly. "And listen," I begin to add, "I'll talk to Morgan. Really, what happened to Reid is not your fault."

"Thanks Em, thanks so much."

I get up off the couch and head to the door. After one last look and smile, I open the door and step outside. Closing the door I breathe deeply in and out.

"You're welcome, JJ. You're welcome."


End file.
